Every year around this time, I would dedicate a post on my myspace blog (back when myspace wasn't a ghost town) to everything I learned in a year. It started one year as a gag (focusing on the importance of Morrissey in my life), but I found myself going back to read it every so often. It was not only a great way for me to document the most important, and unimportant parts of my year, but it really helped me understand that my life isn't all that boring. Stuff happens, I just tend to forget about it.

So while this post may take you mere minutes to read, it is taking me much longer to write as I playback 2009 in my mind.

1) Always remember to take your slippers off before doing the laundry. Because every time I ascend the stairs to my basement they slide off my feet, and I will inevitably fall up the steps trying to shuffle them back on.

2) Check your teeth after eating black beans. You may go most of the day with black bits stuck in your teeth, and nobody will tell you about this for hours.

3) Don't ignore what you truly love. As far back as my childhood, I loved clothes, colors, patterns, fabric, and I annoyed my parents by changing my clothes 100 times a day. In my teens I handstitched unusual garments for myself. I was obsessed with couture, and ready to wear, plastering my walls with Betsy Johnson, and Kate Moss. I remember the day Gianni Versace died like it was yesterday. Thinking I would never be good enough at sewing, I never pursued my passions. I know I'm no Vivienne Westwood now, but who's to say I never will be?  I just have to practice. And get a dress form, and learn how to drape...someday...

4) A smile goes a long way. (Remember to check for black beans.) Your day will become a lot more pleasant when you do.

5) Forgiveness, and modesty go a long way as well. I try to remember that when others act negatively towards me, it may be unintentional. I don't know what kind of day they are having, or life they live, nor can I control it. The easiest thing I can do is forgive, be pleasant, and try to put a smile on their face. I also try to remember that I do not know everything. Every time I retain, and display a bit of modesty, I am opening myself up to new ideas, and experiences. By pretending to know everything, you may lose the opportunity to learn new things.

6) My Chuck Taylors require 3 cycles in the wash, and 2 in the dryer. If I wouldn't wear my Cons to work, I wouldn't actually need to wash them.

7) The Smiths are still the best music to clean the house to. I tried to mix it up a bit with some Siouxsie And The Banshees once, and I just wasn't as productive. Sorry Siouxsie, I still love you.
8) Fart jokes are still funny. Don't try to tell me they're not. Don't try to tell me I'm immature. I don't care. They're funny damnit! You know you want to laugh at them.

9) You can never plan for the unexpected. Even when the unexpected turns into "expecting", you still can't plan for that. Life will change in a matter of hours, and you won't always be prepared for it.

10) I realized that Duchess Von Puppyhausen will be one of those "smelly dogs" when she gets older, making it very awkward, and uncomfortable for my future house guests to snuggle her when she asks for it. But I will snuggle her no matter how badly she smells. I love her.

11) Thomas Jefferson will not be a "smelly dog." She will in fact be as awesome as she is now.

12) I have the best hubby in the whole world. Sorry to break it to you ladies. But it's true.

13) If you try hard enough, you can "do it yourself."

14) Don't wake up early, and chug a ton of coffee before your work field trip to Cedar Point. You will probably get motion sickness on the first roller coaster reducing you to being Debbie Downer for the rest of the day.

15) Look both ways before crossing the street, parking lot, driveway, etc. After you look both ways, look again. People love to fiddle with their cell phones while driving, and will nearly hit you. This happens so often to me now, that I am slightly afraid to walk past cars.

16) I really don't enjoy drinking as much as I used to. How sad. I used to be tons of fun. Or just drunk. :)

...on second thought, maybe I am still fun.


17) Menus are dangerous. If you aren't careful, you may scratch your eyeball with one.

18) If you think you don't have allergies, think again. You may need to purchase an adhesive eye patch to protect an eye injured by said dangerous menus, and your face will break out into an ugly swollen rash.

19) You may receive pity tips, and a knowing smile from a customer who's eye has been injured as well, after they see your swollen, ugly, rashy, eye.

20) I am really looking forward to 2010. Why? Who know what's gonna happen. I can't wait to see.